Noted Cum Critic Gabriel Clark Gives 4 Stars to Lorenzo’s Artisinal Spunk

Posted June 29, 2012 2:07 PM by with 5 comments

This is what I’d been waiting for.

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Gabriel Clark, fanatical semen eater, has swallowed the loads of just about everyone on the Cockyboys roster. And yet, this week, after lapping up Lorenzo, he felt the need to weigh in with a review.

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Gabriel Clark and Lorenzo on Cockyboys

Lorenzo: How do taste?

Gabriel: Yours much sweeter than [inaudible].

Lorenzo: Salt.

Parsing a post-coital script worthy of William Carlos Williams may be an exercise in futility, but I’m fairly sure that Gabriel liked Lorenzo’s cum better than his own, and Lorenzo suggested that maybe it just needed more salt. Or pineapple. Or parsley oil. Or Coke Zero. But it does beg the question: why doesn’t Gabriel Clark put out a Michelin guide?

We’ve written to Gabriel to get a run-down on who is worth swallowing and who should be spit, but in the meantime we’ll let you guess. Out of the men who Gabriel has chugged the man oyster, who do you think tastes best … and who is hardest to swallow.
 

1. Kennedy Carter
2. Tommy Defendi
3. Jake Bass
4. Leo
5. Dominic Pacifico
6. Pierre Fitch
7. Mason Star

(Given Gabriel Clark’s ability to clean his plate after the scene (or not), my guess is that Kennedy Carter is the tastiest and that Pierre Fitch the most unpleasantly poutine-like (please, Pierre, allow me to be proven wrong.) But taste is relative: who do you think is the sweetest, and who needs more salt?)

Gabriel Clark and Sweet, Salty Lorenzo (via Cockyboys)

Mike

Related:
Is Gabriel Clark Porn’s Biggest Romantic?
Gabriel Clark and the Case of the Missing Condom

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5 responses to Noted Cum Critic Gabriel Clark Gives 4 Stars to Lorenzo’s Artisinal Spunk

  1. whyowhy June 29th, 2012 at 2:31 PM

    I bet you that Kennedy, Tommy and Mason taste heavenly. If one had to be chosen to not be….umm dominic.

    Reply

  2. Alan June 29th, 2012 at 9:34 PM

    Adrian Long. Gabriel did a threeway with him and Mason Star.

    Reply

  3. boyzzboy June 30th, 2012 at 7:37 AM

    Are you freaking kidding me with this article?

    Reply

  4. Joey June 30th, 2012 at 11:32 AM

    so tired of all this bareback stuff. there is still no cure for hiv

    Reply

  5. Peter E July 1st, 2012 at 12:02 AM

    What a dumbass question.

    Reply

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