Posted August 21, 2013 11:38 AM by with 12 comments

As some of you are aware, former gay-for-pay superstar and ex-boytoy of Calvin Klein Nick Gruber was booted out of a Fire Island charity event by Michael Lucas after he complained about gay people touching him. His apology to Lucas — and Lucas’s incredible response, after the jump …

Dear Michael Lucas: (1)

I am sorry that we had a misunderstanding this past weekend at Fire Island. I did not really understand how a big party like that worked (2), and when I was asked to leave your part of the party, I definitely overreacted. Please accept my apologies.

I came with my friends Hal Rubenstein (3) and his partner David Nichol, who work on the charity arm of the party (Fund In The Sun), but I didn’t understand that people had paid for separate areas. Their fund has donated $750,000 (4) to charities and is an important not-for-profit so I think it’s great that you supported them by buying a private area of your own. I hope I didn’t spoil anyone’s day.(5) It was a fun and unique (6) party and I was glad to be there.

I hope next time we meet we can have a coffee and I can apologize in person.(7)

Nick Gruber

(1) Who calls someone by their full name, unless it’s Oprah? Or unless you’re sending out so many apologies you use mail merge?
(2) You were Calvin Klein’s boyfriend, attended countless benefits in the Hamptons and were feted at Indochine. You don’t know how parties worked?
(3) In addition to everything else, wrote Paisley Goes With Nothing: A Man’s Guide to Style, which I’ve consulted for nearly 20 years.
(4) toot toot!
(5) Giving full Rhoda Penmark here.
(6) Does this mean gay? I can’t decide if he’s ESL or soft-headed or the girl who shit in the ball crawl at a Chuck E. Cheese birthday party.
(7) ” … when Logo brings back The A-List”

… and she got this in response. Savor it.

Dear Nick—
Thank you for your apology. However, I fear that you have misunderstood why I was offended . The problem was not that you had mistakenly come to the wrong area of the party (and it doesn’t matter to me at all who you came with or how much they donated). Many people knew just as little as you did about how the party was set up, but somehow no one else got into a big argument about it.

The problem was that your behavior was boorish and loudly homophobic. Screaming that you are straight and that you don’t want gay men to touch you would be unacceptable in any social situation, much less a crowded gay party. If you are so defensively straight that you truly can’t bear the idea of gay people touching you, then maybe a crowded gay party might not be the best place for you. Please feel free to write “I am straight” on your forehead and stay home. No one will bother you there, and you won’t bother anyone back.

Best, (1)
Michael Lucas

(1) I think you mean, “served.”

Nick Gruber Apologizes To Michael Lucas, Michael Lucas Not Having Any Of It (Queerty)

Gay Porn Star Nick Gurber Denies Being Gay, Kicked Out of Party

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  1. Travis August 21st, 2013 at 1:04 PM

    Hehe, Lucas is a real cunt sometimes but that was deliciously well put.


  2. rdw August 21st, 2013 at 4:46 PM

    Dumbass Nick didn’t write that letter, someone wrote it for him.


  3. rdw August 21st, 2013 at 4:50 PM

    Also, another thing, he’s a superstar in what? Being in amature gay porn and being a trick ass douche hustler for old rich guys? LMAO!!


  4. Brayden August 21st, 2013 at 5:54 PM

    Gruber is one of the most horrific people on the planet. I do not understand why anyone pays an ounce of attention to him. You can take them out of the trailer park but you can’t take the trailer park out of them.


  5. Jon August 21st, 2013 at 6:48 PM

    Nick Gruber’s 15 minutes of fame has ended. It seems to me that he’s got all of three options: 1.) get on his knees and ask Calvin to take him back at half pay this time; 2.)start tricking; or 3.)move out of the country. I hear Russia likes straight guys….hehe!!


  6. Aramis August 21st, 2013 at 8:34 PM

    I would like to say something about Calvin Klein and Nick Gruber’s relationship: ” Money can buy even true love “.


  7. Nealb4 August 22nd, 2013 at 8:29 AM

    The only way to tell if Nick really wrote the letter himself …. was it in Crayon?


  8. sxg August 22nd, 2013 at 8:57 PM

    Oh I find it so hilarious that duckface lucas has the audacity to call out someone on their homophobia when he donated money to Mitt Romney for president last year, and publicly announced he was voting for him. If he doesn't like to be around loudmouth homophobes, then why is he supporting a party who is doing everything they can to prevent him from legally getting married in the US?I'm not defending Nick Gruber, but I'm sick of duckface's hypocrisy.


  9. LEF August 23rd, 2013 at 8:44 AM

    Dear SXG,

    What the hell does it matter to you, me, or anyone else for whom Michael Lucas voted? If he is legally an American Citizen, pays taxes, he has the right to vote for whomever he wishes.

    I am tired of hearing gays that can only vote Democratic; reading profiles online that say “no Republicans,” etc. Vote your conscience, vote for the candidate that will best represent ALL the people, not just you and your sexuality.

    For the record, I am an independent, I have voted Democrat and Republican many, many times. Oh, and I voted for Obama both in 2008 and 2012.


  10. David August 28th, 2013 at 4:23 PM

    LEF Dearest,

    Are you THAT obtuse? Saying that it’s alright for a member of the LGBT community to support and vote for a ultra Right Wing piece of trash like Romney is like saying it’s just fine for an African American to support the KKK. Can you appreciate the cognitive dissidence – can you not see the hypocrisy of Lucas’ calling someone else a “homophobe” while he SUPPORTS ONE FOR PRESIDENT??? Again, are you that dumb, or are you SO interested in being contrary that you’ll slam your own dick in a car door JUST to spite those who say you shouldn’t?

    For the record no one is challenging Lucas’ right to vote for someone who generally despises his very existence, but we ARE SAYING that he will be roundly criticized for doing so. That’s called freedom of speech – as an “independent” you should be behind that 100%.



    • Tim September 5th, 2013 at 2:28 PM

      It’s ‘dissonance’ darling, not dissidence.


  11. 8pmtrain August 30th, 2013 at 10:06 PM

    I suppose the lesson here is, if you’re a washed-up 20-something gold-digging straight-ish gay porn actor and go to a trashy Lucas party, be prepared to get groped and assaulted by random losers. But keep your mouth shut, or queen lizzardface himself will school you publicly in the gay press.

    Sounds like an absolutely stellar event.


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