“IF YOU DO PORN, YOU ARE A WHORE”

Posted May 3, 2013 8:11 AM by with 14 comments



Daniel Nardicio, I have some questions.

The legendary New York event producer, go-go boy connoisseur, and former Playgirl impresario talks about the neo-burlesque movement in a new interview, but sees a stark difference between what he does and what porn stars do.

I am not anti-porn. I am not sex negative. I had sex an hour and a half ago. My whole life is a celebration of sex. But when you do porn, you are a whore. You are paid to have sex. People will always look at you as a whore.

It gets odder

The interview in Hook Online, a site focused on and providing resources for male sex workers, but the interview seems focused on drawing arbitrary distinctions.

I have had a lot of opportunities to work with porn companies over the years. It doesn’t interest me. I don’t like the industry. I am not against it, and I don’t think it should be legislated more than it is. I think you can become a low-level celebrity in the gay community for doing something like porn, but I don’t think you are respected.

It’s like when you are good looking: people want to be around you, but you didn’t do anything. There isn’t talent there. It isn’t like you learned to play the flute, and you practiced for hours. Being in porn, you are just fucking or getting fucked. I think that when people see you having sex, they feel they own a part of you. The difference in burlesque is that performers remain objects of desire versus a sex object.

Colton Ford who wants to be singer is always going to be ‘Porn Star Colton Ford’. He says, “I am proud I did porn.” What else is he going to do? Kill himself?

I’d be interested in hearing what Colton Ford thinks.

Why do you think all these porn stars are committing suicide? It’s no surprise. There are a million reasons, of course. But they are in their 30′s and 40′s and killing themselves. It’s no surprise to me. You build a life on how you look, and it inevitably starts to ebb. Jeff Stryker reached out and wrote me a long email explaining how he wanted to be in Playgirl. Don’t get me wrong. I would want to suck Jeff Stryker’s dick today, and he is in his 50′s. But it made me sad. Eventually, all that attention, all that fame, all that desire: it will ebb.

The problem with this is not Nardicio — he’s a great guy, and someone who’s tremendously talented. Unfortunately, we all get used to having those outside the sex industry treat us like dirt. Which in turn trains you to attempt to make some sex work (like burlesque) respectable by demeaning other sex work. I’ve heard porn stars trash escorting, strippers trash porn, and burlesque performers trash strippers. And I’m sure there are some ballerinas who trash burlesque.

But it’s not limited to sex work. Fashion models trash Playgirl models. Hollywood actors trash fashion models. And it’s always the same: “You’re just using your looks. That’s not talent.” It’s the sex corollary of internalized homophobia. “I may be this — but at least I’m not THAT.”

It’s not having done porn that haunts porn stars (or former porn stars). It’s that people shame you for having done porn. Or is that me now making an arbitrary distinction? And what’s so wrong with being a whore?

Related:
Gay Porn Tube: Go Go Harder
My First Porn Crush: Daniel Nardicio on Brian Buzzini

14 responses to “IF YOU DO PORN, YOU ARE A WHORE”

  1. Jay May 3rd, 2013 at 10:26 AM

    I agree with everything he said; if you take money for sex that makes you a whore. And yes, there’s nothing wrong with that, but I personally am annoyed by some porn stars taking themselves too seriously for what they do or getting mad when someone correctly implies they’re not better than prostitutes( and again, there’s nothing wrong with prostitution either). And his comments on porn stars’ lives revolving around their looks and how this is a cause for the alarming suicide rate in the industry is also very much true.

    Reply

    • marlboro May 3rd, 2013 at 5:42 PM

      Oh please, I have had just about enough from self-righteous assholes who think they are better than the people who do porn. You are watching it aren’t you? You are paying to see it, aren’t you? Why are you superior just because you sit home anonymously? Give me a fucking break, you bunch of hypocritical pompous idiots – and this goes to this Narducio creep who has made his money pimping out good-looking guys in his mags and productions. Total hypocrite. It all reverts back to shame about gay sex. It always does.

      Reply

      • marlboro May 3rd, 2013 at 5:45 PM

        and let me add one more thing, while I am ranting. IF YOU WORK FOR A LIVING, YOU ARE A WHORE IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.

        Reply

        • Jay May 4th, 2013 at 11:14 AM

          See, I actually agree with you, there’s nothing wrong with doing porn, I love my porn(though don’t really pay for it) and there’s no shame in doing it, but I don’t idolize its performers or see them as larger than life figures( as you obviously do). It’s the other extreme that annoys me: they’re not better( or worse) than anybody else, INCLUDING prostitutes. I made it very clear I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a whore, but yes, technically they are whores and you can get as angry as you want, you can’t change that fact.

          If you get mad when someone calls a porn star a whore but then get offended when someone implies prostitutes and porn performers are not better than each other, you are the one who’s royally hypocritical.

          Reply

  2. Mike May 3rd, 2013 at 11:02 AM

    Oh, you should absolutely be annoyed by porn stars who demean escorts. Or escorts who demean street walkers. Or corporate lawyers who demean sex workers. Every day that I do something for the money, or mostly for the money, I’m whoring myself. It’s not a terrible thing, it’s a fact of life. But to act like people who do sex work are beneath what the rest of us do.

    I do most things because I honestly love doing them. But the rest? It’s whoring. Your mind, your body? What’s the difference. Daniel Nardicio is someone I have tremendous respect for, and he’s a good friend. But in the immortal words of Paul Verhoven all of us, in some ways, “take the cash, cash the check and show them what they want to see.”

    Perhaps it’s time we shame the lawyers.

    Reply

  3. BillieXX May 3rd, 2013 at 12:27 PM

    It’s weird. On one hand we yammer much about freedom, but tend to be Victorian when it comes to sex work. Surprised Nardicio falls for this trick. However, it’s way too common.

    Reply

  4. sirfucksalot May 3rd, 2013 at 12:54 PM

    What a JERK! This guy made his rep and lots of money HOSTING sex parties! Every summer, on fire island, he DOES work for Porn companies by hosting and putting on sex parties for Colt and Dominic Ford. So the guy does a one night show with Alan Cumming and Liza and now he sits in judgement. The truth about this snake is he’s bitter that his Ex BF, GoGo Harder, is not doing porn with Ccockyboys so this is his way to trash him.

    Also RE porn star suicides. READ the front page headline of today NYT today…. headline reads –

    Suicide Rates Rise Sharply in U.S.
    By TARA PARKER-POPE
    The suicide rate among middle-age Americans rose 30 percent from 1999 to 2010, with more people now dying of suicide than in car accidents.

    THIS IS NOT A PORN STAR PROBLEM — its an issue effecting everyone. NOTE : The rise in suicides may also stem from the economic downturn over the past decade. Historically, suicide rates rise during times of financial stress and economic setbacks. “The increase does coincide with a decrease in financial standing for a lot of families over the same time period,” Dr. Arias said.

    Another factor may be the widespread availability of opioid drugs like OxyContin and oxycodone, which can be particularly deadly in large doses.

    Reply

    • Jay May 3rd, 2013 at 4:59 PM

      “…it’s an issue AFFECTING everyone…”. Affect= to have an effect. Effect = noun meaning consequence; rarely used as a verb, it means ‘to bring about’. You’re welcome.

      Reply

  5. Aramis May 3rd, 2013 at 8:13 PM

    ” Every day that I do something for the money…I’m whoring myself.”: No.you aren’t. You are selling your work ( the time and the effort spent on it ). When you go into prostitution and porn you are selling your own body.
    ” What’s wrong with being a whore? “: Prostitution put a price on something that is supposed to be given for free. When you do this you debase the human being ( and the sex ) because there’s no way to tell how much a human being worth. That’s why slavery was/is immoral too.

    Reply

    • Mike May 4th, 2013 at 8:50 AM

      Slavery was immoral because it wasn’t consensual. Someone else owned you. Regardless of what you think of sex work as a personal activity, in escorting you still maintain ownership your body, You still maintain the right to enter or cancel a contract.

      So why is selling your body for sex work different than selling your body to picking fruit or a play pro football?

      And who says sex supposed to be free? Why should it be freer than what you do with your mind? If I write advertising copy for McDonald’s, why is that — selling my creativity — different than selling my ability to blow you? Frankly, it’s the former that seems more morally dubious to me.

      Reply

    • BillieXX May 4th, 2013 at 3:46 PM

      LOL!!! If porn is so degrading why are you here porn site that talks about the stuff? Just here for the words? Or maybe it’s cool for you to jack off to porn because it’s not you who is the whore, right?

      Reply

  6. Aramis May 4th, 2013 at 3:21 PM

    I agree. Slavery is immoral because wasn’t consensual but someone else bought you…
    The regular jobs put apart your body from what you are as a person, When you pick fruits or clean houses you sell your ‘work’ not your body. A house keeper, a mason etc are ‘despised’ for what they do, for their social level not for their ‘character’. A pro athlete, a fashion model, etc use their bodies as vehicles ( tools ) not object of exchange. They sell a performance, not exactly their bodies. The same for those who write advertising copy for McDonald’s.
    Prostitutes are seeing as those below any others because they turn their bodies into objects to be used for those who are able to pay the price and then, they add another undesirable component in this trade/relationship: perversion.
    Paid sex is perverted sex because it’s like to ask for money to donate blood. Is degrading yourself for the money.
    As being a prostitute is an option, people will make assumptions and will speak about low moral levels and lack of dignity. That’s why it’s degrading.
    It’s ( obvious ) a question of moral limits. The one who do things that society rejects place itself on the edge of this society. Porn and prostitution are indefensable for our society’s moral standards. If one day they will be accepted they won’t be called ‘porn’ and ‘prostitution’ anymore.

    Reply

    • Mike May 4th, 2013 at 3:32 PM

      So what I hear you saying is that being a prostitute is degrading just because other people think so. That’s like saying gay sex is degraded because other people think so.

      Reply

  7. Aramis May 4th, 2013 at 8:07 PM

    No,it isn’t. It’s about sell what isn’t to be sold.

    Reply

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