Exclusive “Das Einhorn” Excerpt: Dominc Sol and Morgan Black Hookup Online
Its an odd choice to decide to start publishing a magazine given the economy and how easy it is to put up a blog, but even a cursory glance at the smartly designed pages of Das Einhorn (“a new magazine for nancymen”) should quell any doubts. The brainchild of Paul Bookstaber, who used to edit TheSword.com, its a must-read for any gay urbanite, quickly filling the void left by Butt while taking itself way less seriously.
For the cover story, Paul watches over the shoulder of porn stars Dominic Sol and Morgan Black as the real-life couple goes online to look for a third. It’s honest, revealing and frankly brilliant. which you can read exclusively after the jump (just make sure you buy a copy when you’re done).
When Coverboys Get On Manhunt
Starring Dominic Sol and Morgan Black
By Paul Bookstaber (reprinted from Das Einhorn, issue 2)
Morgan Black and Dominic Sol: porn star boyfriends with the kinds of body and face that make me feel sad. Why are really hot couples so annoying, even moreso when they’re totally cool and sweet? And why is their apartment so much cleaner than mine? Why aren’t they addicted to cigarettes too?
I went over to their place to watch them log on to Manhunt and see about ordering cock takeout. We set up to shoot the cover photo while Morgan served strawberries and Dominic logged on to their couple’s profile for the first time in a couple weeks.
What’s the objective when you log on to your couple’s profile?
Dominic Sol: The whole point is to find somebody we find equally attractive, and also someone who’s into us both.
Do you have a secret code that allows one of you to cut a threesome short?
DS: “I’m kinda starting to feel light-headed man…”
Morgan Black: “Yeah, those poppers were just…”
Threesomes can be delicate situations sometimes.
DS: I do get nervous sometimes that threesomes will be hard, that one of us will get left out.
MB: Not me, I don’t trip on threeways. I wouldn’t even mind if the guy were into him and not me. As long as he was respectful about it, and I could watch.
DS: But in that situation I wouldn’t be comfortable, and I would ask him to leave. It’s only come up once, this guy in Vegas told me he was more into Morgan than me, and that was online. It’s never happened in person.
MB: I’m voyeuristic, so I don’t mind watching.
DS: Well, yeah me too. Sometimes I like to get below the penetration and just…get my face right up in there. But I want to have the option to switch to joining. So if Morgan didn’t have the option of participating, I wouldn’t like that. Like, what if I wanted to put his dick in my mouth?
But what if Morgan was like, “Right now I’m gonna pimp your worthless whore ass OUT. Put on the blindfold and get on your stomach you little fuckbitch.” For example.
DS: Well yeah. That sounds good. And the fact that we were best friends with benefits for so long before being boyfriends means that we’re comfortable with each other, and we knew from the beginning that it’d be an open relationship. The blindfolded thing would be hard though, because I’d want to see the dudes. At the same time, Morgan knows my taste.
MB: He likes big muscle guys. I like lean guys.
I’d be lean if I gained twenty pounds. I make a mental note. We take a break from the laptop and the smart phone to practice mouth-fisting and shoot the cover photo. After half an hour, we return to the living room and Dominic checks his inbox. Turns out that a sparkly hot bodybuilder had messaged him at the beginning of the shoot. Dominic responds, but it’s 30 minutes after the initial message, and Dominic fears that his response is too late. He sinks into the couch and starts to frown a little. Until…”Bing!”
DS: Oh wait, he messaged us back!
He reads the message.
DS: Oh wait. We did take too long. He’s meeting someone else.
I had cockblocked them with a photo shoot. I also learned that bodybuilders on Manhunt are probably used to scoring in fifteen minutes or less.
Have you ever rejected a guy at the door?
What’s your line?
MB: ‘MMehhhrrrmmmnnnnnaaaahhh, it’s just not gonna work, I’m sorry.’ And both guys were very understanding and fine with it.
DS: I can remember around six times saying no at the door. My line is always, “Sorry, it’s not a match.” Except there was one time I flat-out told him that he was clearly a different person than the man in the pictures. That was scary. I was in a basement apartment in Boston and he went on a tirade. ‘How dare you,’ he said. He started getting louder and I ran away. But he was the only guy who got upset. With all the other guys I’d get a glass of water to buy myself a little more time to examine them. With those guys the lighting in their photos was just a little too good, or I’d accidentally created my own fantasy of what I wanted them to look like, and the reality fell short.
I’m assuming you have never been turned away at the door yourselves.
MB: No, because I make sure my pictures are accurate.
DS: Yeah, my pictures are me. Very recent me.
It’s true that the most important thing is aspiring to truth in advertising. Hooking up online is the only time I’m grateful for the fact that I’m not photogenic. Looking good in your pics is important, but looking similar to them is even more important, and given the option, I’d choose looking better in person every time.
DS: I will say this. If it’s a compliment or a question, I answer every single email, because someone has taken the time to hit me up.
MB: Yeah, I don’t do that. Me, I choose the dick approach. I read and I ignore. Because otherwise I’d be writing all night!
DS: Well, I use a standard one-liner so it’s not like it takes a while.
But then don’t you end up getting dragged into conversations you don’t want to have?
DS: Well I keep it short and sweet. If they start asking mundane questions, I tell them thanks for messaging and have a good night. Even if someone just asks, “Are you interested?” I always respond with a yes or a no, because I remember what it was like when I was younger, and not so worked out, and sending messages and getting ignored. I didn’t like it, so I try not to do that.
So you’ve got a sort of variation of former fat kid syndrome? Is that why you’re one of those hot guys who are also really nice?
DS: I just feel like it’s respectful. It they have the balls to ask, then…
That’s assuming it takes balls to message someone online. Which it doesn’t.
DS: Well I guess not, but still they took the time. What I don’t respond to is, “into?”
MB: Yeah. Or sentence fragments.
DS: Or, just now, someone sent a message with a compliment, and I said thank you. And now he’s saying, “into? unlock?” No. Fuck you.
MB: My expectations for the online thing are very, very low. Very very very very very low. So I feel other people’s expectations online should be very low too.
DS: And if somebody does ignore your message, it’s honestly not a dick move, because it’s not a face to face interaction. It’s an online communication. And silence can mean one of many different things. I used to automatically think that they just weren’t into me. But now I realize that people have other things going on. Maybe they’re busy. Maybe they’re in their bedroom in a cover photo shoot for Das Einhorn.
“Bing!” The bodybuilder has messaged them again. Dominic quickly reads the text. “Into?” it says. This time Dominic responds within three minutes.
MB: It was like in that movie Burlesque. My whole approach is like when Christina Aguilera begged Cher for a chance and said, “Tell me what you want to see!” And Cher said, “I can’t tell you what I want, you need to show me what I want.” That’s how I feel.
Is that right? You feel like Cher, you little faggot?
MB: Well. Yeah. I guess that example was pretty gay. But what I’m saying is that if someone wants to fuck me then they need to convince me that I want to fuck them. Even if there’s a guy I totally want to fuck, I play it cool, because when you show someone you’re eager, especially in an online environment, they won’t let it happen. They just won’t. Especially if it’s two hot guys. Because I myself think that way, at least subconsciously. I know that if he’s too eager, then something’s up. I go for subtlety.
DS: I think Morgan comes from a different place because he started fucking guys when he was in the army, which meant having to do the whole eye contact game, the slow chase, the assessment of whether the other guy would be open to playing around.
MB: I never thought about it that way.
So you got lots of ass in the army?
MB: Oh yeah.
Were they hot?
MB: These were infantry paratrooper soldiers. So, I mean…
Were they gay?
MB: These guys were all married. And we weren’t even deployed. Their wives were like five miles away.
Have you ever used a weapon in sex play?
What’s your ‘game’ then?
MB: Play hard to get.
DS: That’s something I don’t know how to do.
MB: When I first met Dominic at the gym, he’d walk right up to guys and introduce himself. In a normal social environment, I think it shows a healthy attitude. But with hookups,I think that direct approach can be off-putting.
DS: See, I’ve always hated the whole chase bullshit. When I was younger I would walk up to guys and ask them flat out if they were attracted to me. And it would freak them out. “Dude I don’t even know you,” they’d say. Other times I did get a, “Yeah, let’s go.” What’s the point of that whole courtship?
MB: It’s a mating thing!
I remember the advice I received as a baby gay when I pouted and declared that I would never play games. The response: “There is no escaping the game. If you refuse to play it, then that right there is your game.” My thoughts are interrupted with another “Bing!”
MB: The bodybuilder is telling us to check out the guy that he’s meeting, and he’s not that hot at all. He’s just got a big dick. So, the ugly guy gets to fuck the smoking hot guy because he has a big dick. Of course. I’ve never really understood that.
DS: Yup. I’ve been told no before because mine is under 8 inches.
Dominic wants to order a pizza. Morgan says no because they haven’t been to the gym in four days. They make protein shakes instead. A stud with a screename touting the wonders of his asshole messages them.
MB: I want to eat that butt!
DS: Me too. He wants to cam. And he’s in NYC.
MB: Well tell him we’ll be there in a couple days.
What do you look for in a profile?
MB: Clear discernible photos. Not a nipple, or some sort of pixelated mess with what could, maybe, be a torso with a T-shirt on, but it could be, you know, George Bush, there’s no distinguishable features. When I look at a profile I need clear discernible well-lit naked photos. Otherwise they’re hiding something, period.
I personally can’t stand close-up shots of the intestinal wall. How about when it comes to text? Any dealbreakers?
DS: ‘Horned.’ I hate that word. Horned. I mean, I’ll still fuck you, it’s not a dealbreaker, but if you say, “I’m horned up,” then it’s going to be annoying.
MB: I hate all caps.