5 GAY PORN SCENES THAT MIGHT BE CAUSING THE GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN

What do these five new gay porn scenes have to do with the government shutdown? More than you might imagine … 

1. Austin Wilde and Brad Rockwell (Guys In Sweatpants)
A simple g-rated portraiture session ends in unrestrained screaming anal. This was originally a storyline from House of Cards, I swear. Or maybe it was Real Housewives of D.C. More …

>

2. Colby Jansen and Darius Ferdynand (Men of the UK)
Colby Jansen is as hot as a red-state locker room. So while Men.com is saying this the gay porn version of the Matrix, we all know it’s a loose allegory about the tense relationship between Leon Panetta and the British Security apparatus following the London train bombings of 2005. More …

3. Conner and Dario Beck (Titan Men)
Conner Habib is as close to a pundit as the gay porn industry has. Dario Beck looks vaguely like a young turk. If you want to know what it’s like to cruise Rock Creek Park with a disactivated Blackberry and no morals, this is it. More ..

4. Easton and Smith (Corbin Fisher)
How many foreign-baked offspring of gay Beltway dads are going to be named after Corbin Fisher models? All of them, probably. Easton, Smith, Clinton, Dixon, Kennedy, Silas, Tanner, Reagan, Bennet, Hudson. It’s like a guest list from a Nantucket PNP party, which where I expect half those congressional aides are right now.  More … 

5. Lukas Ridgeston (Bel Ami)
I know we’ve addressed this earlier. The feeling I got when I heard Lukas Ridgeston‘s would return to gay porn was not dissimilar to the incredulous excitement I felt the night of the 2008 election. Bel Ami’s Aslan had returned, and the world is filled with color again. I would not be surprised if Lukas’s reemergence was going to bring peace to the Middle East. Then again, I also would not be surprised if it turned out that he was the Anti-Christ and that he’d be starring in a gay porn remake of the Omen III. Not complaining either way. More …

Related:
5 Gay Porn Scenes to Ruin Your #NoFAP Diet
3 Gay Porn Scenes Dirtier Than The Folsom Street Fair

Tags: Austin Wilde, Brad Rockwell, Colby Jansen, Conner Habib, Corbin Fisher, CorbinFisher, Dario Beck, Darius Ferdynand, Gaytrix, Guys In Sweatpants, Lukas Ridgeston, Men of UK, titan men