August 5, 2003
Wannabe Porn Stars
Apparently Jonno received the same spam from some guy who wants to be a porn star. Click continue to read Jonno's reply. I was foolish enough to write back to him with essentially the same response (although not nearly as elequently), and I will probably be added to a zillion other spam lists.
Although, unlike Jonno, I am currently looking for models, but I still smelled something fishy about that email. I also got this this email that same day:
From: "John Llamas"
Date: Mon Aug 4, 2003 8:09:29 PM US/Pacific
Subject: I am seeking a role in gay adult movies, please read below
Reply-To: "John Llamas"
Hello,,
My name is John Llamas. I am an amateur gay adult actor who has the unique
distinction of weighing well over 300 pounds. I have starred in several
specialty amateur videos and want to break into adult gay films
professionally.
I will willing to audition upon short notice. Please contact me via email
ASAP
Best regards,
John Llamas
###
From the jonno.com mail bag:
From: "Robert"
Date: Sunday, 3 Aug 2003 16:44:15 -0700
To: jonno (at) jonno.com
Subject: I am looking to audition for gay male adult films ...
Dear Jonno,
My name is Robert, and I go by the film name Daddy Big Bucks. I am an amateur gay male adult porno actor, and I seek to audition for gay adult films.
Can you assist me, or barring that, can you send me to someone who can help me?
Thanks.
�
Dear Robert,
It is generally the custom among us, when we write to strangers to inquire about the possibility of pornographic employment, to attach sample photographs of ourselves or the URLs of sites containing the same, which you did not do.
While I count among my acquaintances several individuals who are involved in the production of gay adult films, both amateur and professional, I cannot in good faith recommend you to any of them without knowing more about you. Your nom de guerre would lead me to believe you are more suited for certain types of porn than others, but of course this is merely conjecture on my part.
Therefore, in the absence of any visual support material, I can do little more than commend you to several helpful online resources which may assist you in your endeavor.
Best of luck in your career, and remember: in porn, there are no "featured players" ... only stars!
Thanks for writing,
Jonno (dot com)
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